"Sin" City -- Yeah...RIGHT
The hubs and I got to Vegas in record time...I think it may have taken us longer than anyone else this year. But, we got in, and raced right off to a bar. Because that's how we roll, okay?
So, there we are, in Red Square in the Mandalay Bay complex, having some kick-butt and scary expensive martinis. A couple of fun guys sit down next to us, and soon, it's a party for four -- sharing booze and jokes and generally having fun.
It's a Sunday night in Las Vegas -- the Sunday before Thanksgiving, I must mention -- in the middle of a scary crappy economic situation, so you'd FIGURE that they'd be thrilled we were there, drinking and laughing and generally showing their place to be a hip, happening spot. And you would be wrong.
One of the guys -- who I'll call John, since that's his name -- was telling ribald jokes in a loud and ribald manner. And he was told to keep it down. And to stop cursing. (This just in: Loud voices no longer allowed in Vegas.)
So, he tried. But we were drinking a LOT of vodka, and, well, fun folks get loud, okay? So, he got told, again, to stop talking loudly and, above all, to stop using "foul language". (This just in: Dirty words no longer allowed in Vegas.)
He tried. As God is my witness, he tried. But, you know, the jokes were good dirty jokes and, as will happen when a man is drinking $350 a bottle vodka (no freaking lie), he got loud again. And we were told, in no uncertain terms, to stifle John or get the hell out.
Yes, it's true. The hubs and I were kicked out of a bar in Vegas for being too loud and ribald. And the bar in Vegas kicked out two men who were -- up until our group shunning by the apparently Amish folks running this particular bar -- planning to try each and every vodka in the place. And the place has hundreds of vodkas. (This just in: Making money on the overpriced sale of alcohol no longer as important as decorum in Vegas.)
So, we went to another bar, where the DJ was rolling hot 70's tunes and John and I disco danced and were loud and obnoxious because no one could hear us while the other guy (name protected so his wife doesn't think he was doing anything untoward -- which he wasn't, since he wasn't being loud or using dirty words) and the hubs chatted business (sorta) and the other guy convinced the hubs that dancing with one's own wife is a good way to keep said wife happy.
I had a great time. I loved these two guys...at least, what I can remember of them. We all had a LOT of vodka. My only regret is that our new friends live in Texas and so I can't party with them on a regular basis. (This just in: It's apparently more fun in Texas than in Las Vegas.)
And remember if you're going to Vegas, you behave yourselves and keep the noise, and especially the dirty words, down. Decorum, that's the new Vegas slogan. And above all, do NOT, under any circumstances, order the $350 a bottle vodka and expect to be treated well by the bar staff.
Love,
Gini
Holiday Tip #2: If you buy Gini a bottle of $350 a bottle vodka, she will love you no matter what else you do.
Labels: Amish, decorum, dirty words, disco, disco dancing, foul language, gini koch, humor, jokes, Las Vegas, Mandalay Bay, Red Square, Texas, Thanksgiving, vodka, vodka martini, writing